The lesson on the Oxford Comma resulted in quite the controversy at school in the days that immediately followed. To quell the potentially violent dispute, some seventh graders took it upon themselves to draft a peace treaty. Apparently, there was also controversy over several word pronunciations, and they were also included in the treaty.
A PEACE TREATY
Those who sign this peace treaty hereby agree to the following terms, conditions, and statements:
I will not discriminate against those who do not use or believe in the Oxford Comma and its collective usage. You may peacefully discuss your views on these terms in a polite, calm, and respectful manner.
I will not address any non-user of the Oxford Comma as Canadian, non-American, immature, unintelligent, wrong, or juvenile, nor will I make any threatening statements or official reportings to the immigration office.
I will respect those who use the Oxford Comma, those who do not use the Oxford Comma, and their opinions / views.
Also, any arguments / thoughts over the pronunciation of “Settlers of Catan,” “data,” and/or “GIF” will be resolved by spelling out the word when used in conversation.
*Please disregard any use of the Oxford Comma in this document. Thank you.
Incidentally, I could not sign such a treaty. I maintain the right to disparage those who fail to appreciate such a beautiful piece of punctuation.